The New Year beckons. A brand new 2008 with no mistakes in it. The proverbial clean slate, and all within the next 24 hours. As you get older, the years slip past and it’s harder to keep track of the days. There are parts of the day when you sleep and then there’s the rest of it when you hustle and bustle it away. One entire life span can be divided in this way, the wakening hours and the non wakening ones.

Right now I want to enter into the non-wakening time zone but am thwarted from my sleep by angry thoughts that bubble to the surface of my already exhausted mind. I want to sleep, I do really, but then, I get so angry thinking about stuff that I can’t sleep. Even though I’ve already made a conscious choice to not think about it. That’s the thing about that in-between state of mind, your brain doesn’t really listen to you.

But yeah, I shouldn’t allow myself to get so mad, I should simply detach and elevate my soul / emotional being into another plane of existence. One where things don’t matter, and I see things through the macro lens of eternity. And then things don’t matter. Lack of money doesn’t matter, lack of clothes doesn’t matter. Polish or rather more accurately, lack of polish does not matter. Time and chance happen to us all.

If one refuses to be a victim, to do something about their lives. One would be infinitely better off, obtain the desired improvement in one’s quality of life and get on with the program. One wouldn’t resent other’s improvement but think that they can do it too. Life’s better for one and all.

Perhaps the next big thing to overcome is insecurity. Insecurity about oneself can make one a cantankerous person that cannot be lived with without exhausting another’s store of patience and kindness. “I know where I come from and where I’m going.” That’s perhaps sums up the way of perfect security, perfect comfort in one’s own skin. To know where you come from and where you’re going solves the better part of life’s problems in my opinion.


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